It was many years after being diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis that all of it, the confusion, the sadness, the pain, the loss of pieces of myself, the loss of future plans and my health when I realized Gods purpose for me.

I was just another insignificant daughter, wife, mother and friend who stayed in my comfort zone. I was happy and content in not making a big splash that I had arrived. I was busy and involved with participating in everything my three daughters did. 

My youngest was in high school at the time of my diagnosis. Entering a gymnasium and climbing bleachers to watch a volleyball game could put me into a panic due to balance and vertigo issues. Taking care of our large two story home became exhausting and dangerous. 

Eventually I came to the realization that my life was changing in one heck of a hurry.

So I asked myself “what is the point” “why me” and “what am I supposed to do now”? 

The answers to those questions didn’t hit me all at once but just a little at a time. When I couldn’t drive safely anymore I had to ask for help, relying on other people for everything I could no longer do and having time on my hands humbled me and allowed me to look at my future in a different way. I discovered that life is full of things that I had been too busy to recognize prior to my diagnosis. 

Turns out, I was able to give of myself more to family and friends, writing a weekly blog helped to release all of the emotional baggage I had been carrying for so long, I found a new relationship with my higher power that keeps me grounded and most of all, I pray that my example of living with chronic illness will help someone else’s struggle become a little less daunting.